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W H A T I D O when I'm not using my hands...
(that is, when not with someone else, I spend time with... )
 At the Site Map / Organization Chart page
There is a complete list of offerings, including a list of essays, charts, graphics, etc. It's all arranged in graphical context with the essay "How and Why this Site Is Different" telling how all the below things and more are actually related through the cross-discipline inter-relations and approach of this site. And how that relates to *Chalice-Bridging* and to healing. [OK, Flash! 7/13/09: the top chart is now Internet-Explorer-Friendly, although not as fancy (no fly-out menus) as when using Firefox, but true web-developers have yet to volunteer their services. - cp, 10'08]
Body-Mind Integration
This site's 1st index page includes many of my first essays on the subject (some published, one in a professional magazine), from general overview to in-depth into the processes, attendant exercises & therapies, as well as related health topics, & lots of other links. My Brochure is here for my vocation in Body Mind Integration. The long form of that is "Body Mind Integrative Awareness & Reiki Energy Bodywork Therapies -- for Individualized Approach and Training for High Performance, Awareness, and Integral Being." This is my actual primary income-deriving work. I also accept donations for helping me with the hundred or so web pages I offer via the Chalicebridge.Org & PolyPsyArts.Org sites.
Body-Mind-Chalice Integration Art Index Page
Artwork on the "Chalice" or Grail theme... some keywords/ topics: human embodiment of Spirit three "lower bodies," *The Da Vinci Code* Male AND Female energies create a bio-electric charge, a vortex of energies, the universal chalice, "Pragmatic Balance", "bridging" (interconnectedness and understanding) of all opposites, "sacred geometry", symbology. (updated 7'07, 10'09)
4C-Publishing (Chalice Creations and Concept Charting)
About Desktop Publishing , including Vibrant Greeting Cards, Logos, Display Ads, Promotional Presentations, Charts & Web Books, Mandala & Prayer Cards. This page also has a sampling of "Vibrant Greeting Cards" Sacred Geometry Art, Newsletter and other Designs - thumbnails or links to full size work or samples. An even better portfolio (?) is presented at my Facebook page. (updated 6'09)
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Chris by Artwork (a 2005 photo over 2009 artwork) |
O N V I S I O N, E V O L U T I O N, A N D T H E F U T U R E (?)
Including a page of prayers and invocations, 16 prayers as of Aug '09, with Sacred Geometric and Sacred Earth backgrounds by yours truly, to assist us in "holding the vision" of our potential." Note that the World Healing Prayers & Invocations related to positive vision and empowering attitudes, accessing, connecting, and utilizing resources. Some are designed for healing the planet, some for furthering the cause of justice. Many are for the maintenance and strengthening of democracy with an effectively aware and pro-active citizenry and a healthy economy.
Other pages at this site are born out of similar hopes, dreams, and visions, including the The Fascia-Memory Project. Which is about prospective research (theory originated in 1994) into the relationships of connective tissue (fascia), 'body-Memory' & related dynamics, as well as research into new connective tissue scanning devices (9 pages, including 2 Charts). And there is Evolution Trends: The 'Information Age' And Its Evolution Into The 'Holographic Age' about challenges and realistic goals for survival and creating a desirable future, written in Nov'95. When I use the term "evolution" at this website, I am referring to the psycho-social evolution of humankind, not the physical as we generally consider it. And usually from the perspective or paradigm that looks at the recent psycho-social trends - in comparison to the overall course of mankind.
S O C I O - P O L I T I C A L C O M M E N T A R Y A N D D R E A M S
Political "weather reports" from a psychological perspective (Gestalt/ Buddhist/ New Thought, by a veteran-become-student of health, therapist, trends monitor, and activist for peace & justice), on a small number of pages include:
"Why Politics At All" - (I mean, how "spiritual is THAT?!  ). Including "Managing a Love/Hate Relationships with Politics" - some thoughts about a pretty tricky dance. Provides the paradox element (eg: where I'm actually coming from  ) on the site's 'bad humor page': satire and expose of certain people I call "Machiavengelicals." Some key parts of that tricky dance is covered in "Trends, Memory, Tracking, and Forgiveness" including TRUST re: "Discrimination and Whether, When, or How to have Expectations of Accountability." At "The Political Page" there is also a piece about "The Four Governments" (actually, the four realities or belief systems going on and ideas about actually making it work for PEOPLE). And How A Marine became a Veteran for Peace (and even more) bio ).
In the Resource Section are links to sites for quick letter-writing activism, for responsible buying and investing, and for finding the goods on every politician and organization in, on, or about politics, issues, support groups, & donations. Towards empowering the highest momentums within us, there is "Recovering Democracy at the Crossroads - Political Activism, Apathy, & Healing" introduces a study in current “Poly-Psy” with three graphic flow charts and pragmatic discussion for society’s waking up and healing itself. And when we're REALLY ready to go for it, there is the The virtual U.S. Peace Academy @Seattle - for students choosing alternatives in peace, to facilitates resources and connections to institutions teaching peace, mediation, and related subjects, and perhaps to help inspire the creation of an actual US Peace Academy. More partisan sections include commentary and links for choices in the Post 9/11 Material World.
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Here's that link to the
"Personal Ad" Summary
(Longer than the above, but shorter than the below  ) that (I hope) leads you to know whether I'm compatible for you or not - in case you came here to check out the potential for a match-up.
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To TOP LINKS  Section
Just About Yours Truly (Christopher & Family):
Ok, just me now, you brave soul, you , ...
Well, it's true, it took you only a chasm-leaping risk for you to get to what took me years to prepare -- for you (oooohh aaahhaaaa)... I just put together many little pieces of email and other scraps I'd written since '93, tho' I've primarily just edited since '97. I added some of my more recent jokes and riddles and plays on words (recent in '87 - they're timeless actually, but still bad  ), and wha-lah presto zowie zam! and (see, even the Batman sounds take a long time comparitively) Poof! there it was! The page was older than fruit cake before it was published!  (And after it's 2003 editing it's original alure remains!) Can I go to jail for that?
I'm sure many (who know me only through my various vocations, that is) have wondered if I have one. I wondered that myself, then Life forced me to develop a sense of humor (besides having an independent and very intelligent daughter to entertain and keep motivated - good training in humility, too. Oh, I'll get into bragging about her later on...). But then I Started out with a mind/senses that doesn't quite perceive the world in the same way as most folks (well, not very often apparently - or so my associates have been hinting). Then I found an excuse in the Kiersey Personality typing system: says I'm an INFJ (1 % of population; less since I'm also male). And.. there's this Cardinal Cross, Grand Trine thing ... where's that twilight zone wav file ? |
Youth Flash !
Watch - Out !
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What would it
be like if we solved the conundrum of what it truly means to
"Act our Age" ?
If you think about that very long, how many different moods do you entertain ?!
I'm a lot like my dad, a simple man and almost conventional in many respects -- hmm, well, I live simply, and I enjoyed contact sports and hard physical work when younger, including carpentry and hauling hay for the three Summers of high school. But I've always enjoyed working with my hands, including with sculpture, sketching, and drafting.
My size allowed me only a very short running back carreer after 10th grade, although running head-on into large linebackers did earn a little respect. In junior high flag football I could kept the flag hard to get to by turning around and round - with my "crazylegs," a classmate had said - as I ran downfield with the ball. By 11th grade, my 10.1 speed (100yrd dash) let me compete in track (although my friend Donnie Quinca averaged an amazing 9.8!). And I just had to try wrestling my senior year - at 165 lbs, by end of season I could actually hold my own with the guys in my weight category. That led Will Rogers HS to actually letter me, although it was probably for my "6th Hour" efforts overall, keeping a few varsity members working harder to stay ahead of me perhaps.Well, I probably would've been in varsity at most any other high school, since my graduating class alone had over 1500 students. [ Well, there I was, trying to be modest, but my old age had me returning a time when I apparently wanted a little more applause.  Ahh, Thank you! 
In baseball I very much enjoyed the position of catcher from the 2nd grade through 10th grade. It even seemed natural to massage the arm of my pitcher friend when he complained he didn't know if he could finish the inning - after the game (that we won, I think) he told me it made all the difference. [ Amazing how much time & learning accrued before I discovered my vocation.  But back to physical stuff: ] Nowadays, I ocassionally find a little baseball to play. I like hiking a lot and really enjoy the energy of the rain forest, although I do miss the much more constant sunlight and warmth of the Midwest. Actually, I love the dry heat of New Mexico and Arizona, but also enjoy the California varieties.
Zen Riddle: If a mystic throws a temper tantrum in the forest, will the trees hear it?
I've been a bit slow when it comes to communications and relationships - but Capricorns can be late bloomers at various things, "slow but steady learners". My siblings were all convinced I was going to be the smart ("spoiled" ) one who got more education, and probably be a priest. Well, we turned out a good preacher (once I hit 33 or so and was getting through a fairly introverted beginning .... jeez, it (near evangelism compared to before) was almost dangerous once I got going ). And I'm not bad at doing a spontaneous ceremony when really needed. But my varied interests were just not to be so contained. Besides, I don't think I could enjoy celibacy for anywhere near that long.
I have spent a fair amount of time alone, partly because of my interests being so cerebral if not focused on my sensory kinesthetics. On the other hand, I really enjoy being with people. It would be more accurate to say that the ' I ' -- the 1st letter of the INFJ type, having to do with Introversion, vs ' E ' for Extroversion -- is *not* heavily in the ' I ' direction. Still, I can be about as shy as anyone I've ever heard of when it comes to actually meeting people. In high school, When not doing sports I was usually studying or reading. I didn't "hang out" - was introverted to the max. I sketched things in many classes as listening (or not) but made good grades. A little bit ADD maybe? In grade school... well, remember the kid in the back of class that was always driving you to the edge, constantly tapping with his fingers and feet ? Yup, that was me. But only in recent years have I really been getting into drumming. I have a couple of frame drums & a custom built (unusually wide-ranged) jimbe so far. I even have a 15 minute repertoire on my guitar -- if you don't mind 14 versions of "House of the Rising Sun." -- Ok, 4 versions .
Ahhh, speaking of music, I actually found an entertaining and talented way of putting forth my philosophy ... Ok, I found a singer who's songs do... well, actually, an incredible job of that: Ed Munter in his album, "Tracking Down the Soul" ©1996 Wash Your Dish Music. You thought I would put a midi of me singing here? uh, nah... Besides, Ed even *sounds* a lot like Bob Dillan.
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By the wall mandala and chalice set, Spring '08.
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And in the picture, that's Kevin the Dragon (with the big eyes on the right). The handful of little "stuffies" in my place represent that part of me that keeps me young, curious, and hopeful - even "in the real world." (Which world can too often seem to require such serious attention otherwise).
Q: When are lies absolute? A: On the golf course.
Shyness can be challenging at times when also managing some of my other traits (and even this humor ) I'm the only person I've met who can come up with as many theories about most anything ...I decided I'd be a trend setter. <g> Well, actually, it's just that I haven't got the time to keep up with or follow whatever the current thing is. Ok, so no one is wearing my style yet ... (Wait a minute, did I see someone with my Okie short sleeves ? -- that's long sleeves rolled halfway up the wrist )
I like reading stories aloud for my lady at bedtime - I'm a co-nurturer, addicted to smiles, perhaps. Two of my favorite books for this have included *Mists of Avalon* by Mary Stewart, and *Nine Faces of Christ* by Eugene Whitworth (not about Christianity but about the Golden Thread within and linking all religion).
I'm into art-appreciation: What I marvel at the most - and hence my area of vocation and constant study - is God's art in the human form, and that includes our whole Being and cosmology -- as well as the artistically rendered esoteric symbolism of all that - as I hope my Chalice art page shows. Uh-oh, got serious there
I also enjoy watching movies with a partner and, when motivated I can even do some interesting cooking. (Ok, if the truth be told, I mostly I enjoy other's cooking, helping out and getting a little in the way in the kitchen, but I have usually obeyed when told to go sit. Meanwhile I'm generally creative and definitely efficient (at cooking, living simply & compactly, - and at many other things as well, maybe).
Massage "Tip": How to heal a Charlie Horse: Hush Puppies help a lot. Try a Lamb Chop?
(Thank you for the inspiration, Chari Lewis, we will miss you) |
My daughter Ahnna is why I am in Seattle, she having been born in Oklahoma after her mom married me in a Quaker wedding there. My ex later returned to Washington with our daughter, lived for a time with her parents, and then moved here. Not long afterwards (1987), I moved here to do the part-time Dad thing. That's my daughter (pic at right under the beard :-) at almost 2 years old (from 1985). Ahnna is a young woman that actually enjoys very simple pleasures in the wilderness, as well as working with horses. In grade school with A's in most everything, she especially excelled in artwork (especially water colors), quickly drew cartoons of her friends (which cartoons they like ), tolerated her music training, competed with the best for her age group in the low-hurdles.
She even tried to be goofier than me sometimes! For someone who was raised by two introverted parents, she used to surprise us as an engaging extrovert with her buddies. Her mom and I have been fairly dedicated to her well-being, maybe especially since, even because of, the divorce. We had shared the abhorrence of what lawyers do with divorcing parents (and so avoided that), and have seen what parents' back-biting does for the child (and so resisted that, but then we usually get along anyway), and it's apparently paid off.
I can not say enough about her mom's tireless dedication to providing the most supportive environment. We greatly respected the ideas/truths in The Magical Child, by Joseph Chilton Pierce: from the time she was born (sometimes when she was sleeping), I always told my girl she was brilliant and could accomplish anything she put her beautiful heart into. She apparently believed it, with so many talents that she struggled at times with decisions about what her main focus should be. |
Ahnna, Xmas '84 with Dad
Ahnna & dragon "Sir Gwain" she made for me in '91 |
Ahnna & Dad in 2001 |
Ahnna's development of her talent in water colors was ever invested, however, as her web site, ArtByAhnna.Com attests. Those and other skills brought her just short of a double major, graduating in June of '07 with a degree in Drama (design & application in theator sets, costumes, makeup, etc). At her graduation reception, she wow'ed everyone with an eye-popping 3' by 2' portfolio album - not only with its many types of media, each bringing out the beauty of the other on each generous page, but also with the overall layout and design. Given what she could do with a photo-album at 10 years old, I guess I should not have been surprised.
After that, when it came the right time to show off her prolific work on line, she revealed yet another set of skills. I was amazed at how, once her focus shifted to it, she then built an admirable first website - design and content fill - considering how long she had resisted any kind of digital application of her art world. (I should know, I encouraged her for years before that. But from her mom came her tenacity for the hand-made arts, her common sense in the work world, and her great sense of timing, among other things.)
But most importantly, she has a good heart as well as a good mind and good health. Thank you God! Oh, and she wears my "Dudley DooRight" jaw - wayyyyy better than I do! |
I haven't thrown out the TV yet -- I use it at times to channel my cynicism -- "Therapy" -when I haven't yelled at the computer in a while - ( and a few times to motivate my psycho-social trends essays (although most of the original was otherwise generated). And then there's the pc I do a lot of writing on and cussing at -- more on the pc in the next section. [ NOTE: When I use the term "evolution" at this website, I am not referring the physical level as we generally consider it. ]
And I like Star Trek, M.A.S.H., and some of the spiritual/psych drama stuff that took them forever to get on the TV --Well, I've been doing the consciousness-related studies since my last year in the service -- at 21 -- and at 27 became a crusader for alternative energy and environmentalism, peace, civil rights. Then in another 7 years I had settled into encouraging (providing space/time/energy for) change within one individual at a time, writing one of my first personal growth pieces in that regard. Am progressive in most political concerns and health issues, fancying myself somewhat of a pioneer in the latter, in reference to The Fascia Memory Project.
"PC" ? Let's just say I'm much more patriotic about values and people than I am about nations and governments. I'm choosy about values and if many happen to fall under a heading that some people liken to "brown-nosing," then so be it. I consider "Caring" to be essential. I think I'd make a poor therapist if I didn't. But you can find out more about the political side of that on my " Political Page" if you like.
Q: Why do they say, "there are no wrong answers ?
A: Which "they"? (I know, the same jokes as were here some years ago... but hey, I might surprise you some year!)
I'm not the true nerd, although it seems I've spent half my life at the keyboard since 1993. I'm learning to write more effectively, mainly. Plus enjoy my artwork, other graphics, and learning desktop publishing. And there's the mandatory records, bookkeeping, and related communications for the business. And accounting is not my idea of a fun time. More rewarding, although a bit tedious after awhile, is collecting data on many many topics related to holistic health & healing, consciousness, and related practices. And then there's fixing the #@$%\* programs or the configuration or waiting to see what personality Windows is going to toss at my efforts to get some work done -- [Ok, here's where I've edited out some stuff about Windows software performance. I mean, it actually works now. Maybe the changes in the competitive element had an effect. -cp, June'09]
If you care to write, comment, ask questions, say hi, etc, you can do via email (Christopher@chalicebridge.com)
To TOP Links Section
[Continued below]
T H E I D E A S E C T I O N
Yes. For years I've been using a FUEL EFFICIENCY STRATEGY that can actually create a fun and self-challenging game out of traffic (bumper to bumper, temper challenging rush-hour traffic).
More About it: This methodology helps create a SAFE experience for all. Certainly all those behind you. Actually, *especially* for those behind you, as well as for the guy in front of you. And yes, this technique is very effective on congested highways, especially as drivers in the other lanes see what's happening and catch on to how it's done! In the long run (within any rush hour period) using the technique actually speeds traffic, especially since as a result of using it, a) fewer people are having to accelerate from the stopped position, and/or are doing it less often, b) the likelihood of bumper-crumpling is drastically reduced, c) less stops due to engine overheating, and c) less road rage because people catch on to the steady pace of things.
The heart of the technique, to start with anyway, is guaging the optimal speed for a given situation. I especially watch the brake lights of the farthest vehicle ahead that I can see in my own lane. It's not just knowing how to guage your gas pedal usage. The trick (or game challenge) is determining just how little/seldom can you use the brake pedal and still keep within a certain range of distance from the driver ahead of you. And measuring out that distance with your fuel and brake pedal action. Which can actually can get into to a kind of contest with yourself - which can become a most entertaining game, which is the part that helps with the alertness vs boredom factor, of course. Anyway, let's begin that distance measuring with about 2 to 4 car lengths or so in highway congestion, at 3 to 20 mph lets say. Make that about a 3/4 car length in city street congestion). And these will vary depending on various things you'll figure out as you work with it; practice develops skill. |
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This "smooth pedal awareness game" also saves on fuel and reduces wear on brake systems (both due to much decreased repeated leap-frog acceleration and braking). And you'll be tempted to frustration when someone from the next lane jumps into that "free" slot you've opened, but if you just trust and play that into the game... it still works out. Besides, they won't "get there" any faster than you, and certainly not in the same (constructive) state of mind as you will be in. All it takes is a little habit-breaking discipline, as well as playing with timing and intuition -- in case you're into building such skills, realizing they, along with patience, dexterity, and tactile coordination, are very valuable skills to have in many realms of life. Including love-making - and you might save a life. Ok, well, not necessarily at the same time !
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Back to fuel efficiency now... Please use your tachometer! I'm not sure how many cars have them nowadays - but I believe they can be essential for fuel efficiency. Because speed does NOT necessarily indicate amount of fuel usage. A 1982 manual shift BMW can cruise at 65± mph on "the low side of the tach" (2250 RPMs or so, and transmission ratio's figure into this). But the SIMPLE fact of the matter is that, abiding by your Tach-read RPMs is infinitely more accurate for maximizing fuel efficiency- and therefore also for minimizing ozone depletion. Once you find out where the efficiency range is, then you can ("by feel") keep your engine out of the (low rpm) 'bog range,' |
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as well as out of the (high rpm) waste range. I think there are color codes on the tach for the 'feeling impaired' now. But if you drive an automatic (especially w/o a color-coded tach) then, IMHO, you're either not in touch with the road, or you've got road-feel skills I can only imagine. (Which could also help with that dexterity skill building I spoke of above. But as far as applying the metaphor to gear management: I'm gonna have to guess that the 'automatic' Viagra doesn't help to develop capacities in feel skills here )
And there's one about replacing most stop signs with yield signs - to drastically cut energy use (via reduced deceleration and acceleration) and brake wear, as well as to increase defensive driving levels due to the resulting increased caution at intersections (I was actually a defensive driving instructor in the service). Of course, if you're going to do it legally, that one requires some grassroots action at city hall.
the following are excerpted (without *personal page adlibing* as in the above) from
the Energy Efficient Living page
which ALSO has MANY RESOURCES for sustainable living and making it happen
For rainwater storage I found the Oasis Rainwater Harvesters site (Waste Tech Environmental Ltd. of Yorkshire, UK) to have a more than representative set of different types and apparently useful info for each type...
The Home as an Efficient Vehicle for Recycling: ... I just want to remind you that your imagination is one of the greatest tools, that "object permanence" doesn't need to be. Permanent, that is. Because if we are attached to seeing things in only the standard defined way, relative to it's "normal" usage or purpose, then we may be limiting our use of a thing. Re-Use is the most efficient means of recycling -- cost-wise, energy-wise, time-wise, etcetera-wise -- provided that the re-use doesn't cause danger to someone's health. If "that would be tacky" is your best excuse for not re-using something, then maybe you could employ your artistic potential, or trade your (other) skills for the craftsmanship required to give the object it's retainability or re-usability. ...
How many cassette tapes do you have? Are you aware that it doesn't take a great deal of work to repair and recondition them ...?
My mind loves to create self-help techniques, methodologies, and prayers
(since any real change comes from within, right?).
"Prescription Level" Coffee: Would you believe there can be ways to do coffee in a relatively healthy way? Yes, this is for those who know (or want to know) more than a little about nutrition and are able to apply the methodology. "The Eleven Keys to Coffee Potential Maximisation" text file (no web page version so far). You can also *Right-Click* this link and choose "save as".
Your Immune System and an attitudinal approach that may improve it
My idea of the ideal immune system may give you an idea of how I (would always like to be strong enough to) approach danger or a "foreigner" of questionable intent, as well as potential agents of disease:
I Let it in (in the Taoist view, "it" is already in anyway), feed it for a time, honoring my capacity to safely honor it so as to gain some understanding and appreciation of it's existence and role within and without. Once that is accomplished, if it cannot join my team with benefit or serve any further beneficial role, I let it pass through while showing it the door and giving it incentive to leave, all with the minimum amount of force that will serve the purpose.
The complications we have introduced into the human system -- via our beliefs about disease and health and human potential -- make the above only an ideal to be striven toward in the case of many health challenges today, and not a reality we already enjoy. But as implied above, I believe ideals can be useful as guides, considered in context with any given current reality, and as such, perhaps they are most useful of any type of perspective.
As for prayers: you can find links to World Healing Prayers on geometric art backgrounds (16 prayers as of Aug '09), as well as to a small library of writings, art, and charts - via the main essay/link section of Body-Mind Integration Index page.
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To TOP LINK Section
GENDER & SEXUALITY, "THE STRONG SENSITIVE MALE,"
& MASSAGE - RELATED QUESTIONS
About Gender & Sexuality (and Evolution)
[ Note: In case you stumbled on this page as an potential or actual client (No links to this page from the professional pages exist, although you CAN link from here to there). You should know that your reading this page (let alone this section) would not help your therapy process with me. This would be due to a dynamic called "transference," as related to client/therapist/relationship *appropriate boundaries*. Please do your homework on that if/as the shoe fits. ]
Less Serious Note: some of this gets a little heady -- after all, I'm compressing quite a bit of perception into a very small space - They don't call me a space engineer for nothing -- especially after seeing my place, and how much I can pack into a small space! But if you'll bear with me, I promise you a bottom line -- and no lace. ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I prefer the yin/yang model of masculine/feminine to most anything the western mind has developed for illustrating and quickly lending understanding of overall health in nature. There are charts showing just about every thing, action, food, and attribute (of anything) classified as either internalizing (yin/female) or externalizing (yang/male) to various or specific degrees [Thank you, George Osawa and Herman Aihara; you might Google Search w/these words: Balance, Complementarity, Yin, Male]. Using this model, I will describe how I see/believe/feel the process of our balancing our genders and their natures. I also refer much to the emotional body, to distinguish this part of our selves from the physical body, the mental body, and the etheric body (using the common metaphysical model of four bodies). When I speak of "the Emotional Body" here, I refer to the emotional body of a/our community or society as a whole.
NOTE: Ok, maybe that was a test But if you got your mind around that one without effort you'll have no problem with the rest of this section. If not, but you're still interested, just read the whole thing through, not worrying about the small stuff, and by the 2nd time through things will make sense. Otherwise, or it's late and your brain is tired, just skip to the "Strong Sensitive Male" section for now and come back later :-)
The balancing or "Rounding out" of the Emotional Body for men is not necessarily a "feminization" of it, although it usually isn't a "masculinization" - at least since the pagans and Wonder Woman was in charge, anyway. And still, that doesn't prevent being protective - when it's actually needed. Before The 1960's, men were primarily developed only in the yang (or male) side of the Emotional Body. Whereas women were already developed somewhat in both the yin (or feminine) and yang, although they were rarely given permission by society to express the yang aspect very much. This gave reason for women and men both to realize and communicate that women were more gifted or capable than men in many ways (particularly in the areas of communication and interpretation, many realms of body awareness, intuition, and other right-brain and cross-brain related capacities).
The '60's era provided the beginnings of a great rounding of the Emotional Body, and women took much greater advantage of this permission. As it stands now, I believe that women (in the West, at least) have rounded the emotional body to a great extent, although the permission to express all of that rounding is still lagging behind. Men (in the West), on the other hand, have advanced only somewhat, and I'd estimate that on average, the rounding for them is represented by two events, that of decreasing (the communication of) the yang aspect (due to feeling the sting of the hand being slapped), while only increasing the yin marginally. Even so, we have created a much more healthy "leading edge" of men, who are fairly well balanced in both aspects, while retaining an appropriate balance for their physical body. So far the visibility of these men as role models for society is in the subtle range, but hopefully will grow more and more effective.
This may come as a shock to some, but before the 60's, there weren't too many people that looked at history and saw anything but conquering and colonizing as the main means of world change - besides a great periods of Art interspersed here and there. Since the sixties, we've been enjoying seeing ourselves as "the good guys," while we politely sneer at the British and French and all before them as colonialists.
But in actuality, there hasn't been much change except our gradually increasing guilt about conquering and colonization. We've still been DOING the same thing - just calling it something else (something about "freedom"). Like any *power,* testosterone also has a good purpose or two. But putting one's foot down doesn't have to mean stomping someone just because you can (or waving a flag while you're doing it). But first things first when it comes to evolution, right? Of course at this rate, it's going to be a few hundred years before the average person is disgusted at the notion of conquering a nation to get it's "needs" met at the time they're in "need" (did you notice the quotes on that one? ok, good ). NOTE: You may have noticed by context, that when I use the term "evolution" at this website, I am not referring the physical level as we generally consider it. |
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One of my friends got nailed on the abortion issue for wearing an Obama button at a Catholic service. She's Catholic, and like her detractor, also abhors abortion as well as other kinds of killing. We decided that the next time this happens she agree with the person, but include more detail about the other kinds of killing she hates. EG: the killing of soldiers, both "our own" and those our political leaders have deemed (sometimes in most questionable ways) as "enemies," and especially their families, the torture of same, the resultant life-long suffering of soldiers' due to PTSD and the now ever-increasing number of suicides - especially as a result of the political pit-bulling of our (and "their") kids. And wouldn't it be great if we could get a political leader who would stand against all of those. And of Course, Obama isn't "pro-abortion" but pro-choice, and life and death issues are just not as simple as some politicians and religious leaders would like us to believe. [11'08]
I have known and/or worked with a varied array of (genetically and orientationally varied) folks, some of whose questions or comments motivate this section. For myself, experimenting with the gender aspects other than the appropriate psychological rounding as alluded to above -- particularly via surgery or even glandular therapies -- is just not my idea of a good time. But that is perhaps because I am fortunate enough that my body and mind are more or less congruent, as well as healthy. Overall, I believe in the need for balance in all things (at least eventually), there's my views on body-mind-spirit integration. But here's goes my own notions on revamping "the hardware":
The balanced Physical Body has some critically different roles than does the balanced Emotional Body. Given the different genitalia of the opposite genders, in spite of the growing realization of the need for rounding out of the emotional body, the balancing of the physical body for any one gender has much more to do with integration of various (and note: naturally installed) glandular systems as appropriate to that gender, than it does adapting the given systems or changing them (via surgery or "hormone therapy") so as to imitate the roles and/or nature of the opposite gender. And as I believe there are at least one or two exceptions to most any rule...
The primary exception to the above, I believe, regards when there is an obvious cross-gender nature inherent in an individual due to genetic makeup. Secondarily, I think it's fine for others to experiment with various systems in the universe, including their own physical body and it's uses, certainly if that is the purpose of their life stream in a particular lifetime -- provided their doing so does not cause harm, burden, or dysfunction to/in the overall "spiritual plan" for the universe (and overall, I believe most of them are very similar), to a sustainable healthy planetary bio-social human system, or to other individual living beings, etc.
Ok, so if you're brain didn't catch fire on that, then you might be able to survive being around me when I go to yabbering on some theory (or extrapolation of facts) at any given moment.
"The Strong Sensitive (straight/heterosexual) Male"
[ ...as in *about* same, and IMO, and not that I am "the prime example," but just one humble sampling. And for just in case you're doing research
and you haven't yet found enough misconception about the subject already - and otherwise could be very boring - of course! ]
Visiting Taos, 1996 |
Let's see, if the above hasn't already given you a good idea of (my idea of) some prerequisites for appropriately balanced male and female energies, you might want to read up on the the Kiersey Personality typing system), and in particular on the personality types INFJ and INFP, and then consider what these might look like in a male. Does that imply that ALL sensitive males are INFJ's or INFP's? I doubt it's quite that well locked in - but my intuition says there may be benefit in checking that out. I'd guess these two types have far more difficult a time covering up sensitivity than any other category of men that have been studied (their having singled out the straight men in all above considered groups, since that is what women are apparently finding to be so rare, valuable, and to be sought after). |
Linebacker/Safety at Pendleton, '73 |
| Lets paint the "before" picture for you: I enjoyed sports, including contact sports, and proving that size didn't have to be a disadvantage - my upbringing instilled the "toughness" thing in me fairly well. I tried the Marine Corps thing right out of high school while Viet Nam was raging, but that was actually more out of blind naïveté, desire to please, and the influence of my brothers, not to mention being from Oklahoma. (Ok, be nice, y'all ) Once cured of a certain amount of blindness... (there's more on that on the Political Page, including a few pics, and a page entitled "Questions for Disillusionment") ... the increased capacity to listen and pay attention (oh yeah, and my oldest brother had sent me a very instructive woman back when I was in the service, but moving on... ) I'd say the circumstances of my up-bringing (that I mentioned in the "about me" section above) had a strong effect. Plus, my early psychology and spiritual studies ('74-'79) also helped prepare me for openness to the information I received in a class that I begrudgingly attended on "feminism" (in 1982 or so -- and in Oklahoma no less). |
 As activist in ’84 (32yo), & drumming for 3000 GI's Killed in Iraq (1’06) |
Daughter Ahnna & Dad
At Arlington NW June'06 |
Yup, all my homophobia was up for that class, but my political activist friends assured me for days it wasn't about becoming gay ;-O (Well, Okie ex-marines need lots of convincing at first.) ¹ And about this same time I was doing in-depth studies in Herbs and Nutrition and came across those yin/yang charts I mentioned above (regarding the acid/alkaline balance aspect). Well, I tend to see (and interrelate) analogies, metaphors, and various developed systems of correlation fairly readily, so eventually, the "as above - so below" (Spirit-Mind-Body) thing on the balance of male and female energies had to sink in some time. Did I just esotear you out? (ohhhhhhhhhhhhh!). Well now I'm talking about the integration of my emotional body (not just the mental concept match-making thing) - That part came along very late (1985+)... I could talk about the more painful lessens that more or less force one to learn, but I won't go there here (go here there?) except to say I've learned much in that way as well (apparently goes with the territory of a straight male massage therapist whose clientelle includes a high percentage of politically and/or spiritually progressive women and men, and in Seattle). But then (my saying that) could be just more ego stroking, and proof would be in the pudding |
So am I calling myself a "strong sensitive male"? I'm not talking about being "so sensitive", but about being emotionally aware (and from there, it's one's choice as to whether to be sensitive about something or not, right?) Well, some days I'm not so strong/aware, it feels, but I have always hated the idea of giving up, so maybe I'm just tough -- except for the pain part, or is it because of the pain awareness part? Do you realize there's a whole society built on the "no pain, no gain" thing? Ok, of course you do, but what you probably did not realise is that there just might be a much more all-inclusive, more balanced, more healthy perspective based on Body-Mind Psychology. But isn't pain just part of one's being aware? And of doing one's best to stay aware in this world of growing pains, even when some parts of one don't want to grow anymore? And yes, there are other things to focus on besides pain, let alone writing an essay on it. But here we are talking about sensitivity... there is a relationship, right? ok... And, just in case you wanted to know, these things are also related to energy levels and burnout -ANYONE'S- not just a therapist's³.
OK, so that's one of the answers to the question about why you should care. Some other reasons have to do with emotional manipulation, not to mention pain, and for now will trust you to deduce more from my other notes on the subject and better research elsewhere (well, possibly ). |
"Off-Planet" @SLO,CA '86 |
On the other hand...
Youth Flash !
Watch - Out !
|
Ok, now if you claim you've always wanted one of those strong "sensitive males,"... well, please try to notice whether or not a part of you might be tagging something onto that. That is, a desire for one "who's sensitive about me and my needs only, and let's not be 'whiners,' and have feelings about other peoples' needs, including those we don't even know." If this is going on, then you do not really want a strong "sensitive male." You may want someone to tend mainly to your inner princess. On the other hand I love nurturing and spoiling in various ways and more than just on occassion, but just not for the ego's sake. (I think that's at least six or seven hands by now, and you're probably getting this image - there's this God/Goddess called Shiva with all these arms... )
And yes, every women, like every man, has an ego -- it usually just hides or displays differently than a man's does. Proof would be yours if that last statement bristled your attachment to believing otherwise. Really. No, I'm not kidding! heheheheheh... Not to worry, my inner psychologist is into the Gestalt Perspective, and Body-Parenting. So, even if you would be around me (as a partner or potential partner) when that (therapist) part of me does pop out, you'd be safe from judgment. Because (since you wouldn't be a client) it wouldn't emerge, except for when working on myself (and I let you witness that), or if you ask for instruction about how you approach something within yourself - on your own, or if I'm profiling some political situation or related person. The point being, I'm very accepting of feelings (negative or positive, APPROPRIATELY EXPRESSED) as I would expect my good friends or a partner to be. |
To TOP LINKS Section
How does a man massage women professionally?
(It's one of those questions a few guys have occasionally asked me, leading me to suspect other folks would like to ask too.)
Quick Answer: "Professionally."
Long Answer:
Introductory Note:
I'm not a teacher on the subject, but from my experience (since '83) I will try to cover a few common areas of question and/or misconception. Someone has to try, right? My learning in these realms has sometimes been difficult. For this reason and for the edification (as needed) of other current and potential therapists, I developed a rather sophisticated list of considerations (available for professionals and instructors of such). This has to do with the most challenging situation variables that the massage therapist may encounter. Based on these, and put in layperson's language (although some of it may sound a bit esoteric to the average person), I wrote "Questions for Boundaries." This (affirmation-based) exercise was developed to also be instructive when simply read to get helpful information, and so is also useful for non-therapists who have challenges in regard to boundary issues. It might also have been called "Advanced Techniques in Unlearning Co-Dependency." More considerations may be found an essay written from a view both naturopathically and spiritually inclined, Compassion, Healing, and The Practitioner -- and Detouring "Burn-out". For a thorough list of resources on the subject (which may or may not include the above) you would want to use your web-search engines [you might try these keywords: boundary issues, transference, counter-transference] and/or check in with one of your local massage schools. There's also a note below on energy levels and burn-out, ³ and one in the section above on pain.
But to address the particular question above:
Let's be honest. The implied question (from a guy's perspective) is more about "not doing" than doing, right? Hence, the key must be in one's FOCUS: One doesn't "not do" something with very much skill (e.g.: that pink elephant thing: the harder you try not to see it, the more you can't help but see it). And we use "draping" of course, but in any case, and since I am not blind... Early in my practice I was simply thrilled just to be able to do this work and even get paid for it - of course it's very rewarding to make people feel better, and they say very nice things to you, and so on. Anyway, early on I was generally so focused on making sure I was using the right technique and covering all the basic bases, etc. Later, when I realized I was probably one of the more skilled therapists (and I guess so my mind might wander at times) I would, when being "tempted," I would *will* the focus to be on other things that I am very interested in, i.e.: health, psychology, nutrition, technique, intuitive aspects, spiritual aspects. These are the things I've always written a lot about since '77 or so, so realms are of thought come pretty readily, and especially when I'm doing my work.
And besides this, my senses (those that a massage therapist will develop after so many years - from sensory to empathic), are always feeding me information that I enjoy integrating with such as the above aspects. That includes how the client's muscles and tissues feel to my touch as well as how they sense my touch, on how they move, and how they relate and communicate to/with each other, or how, when, where they don't do this (Yes, this is actually quite an interesting thing to many massage therapists -- and this provides the 'body' part of my Body-Mind psychology writings, after all ! :-)
That doesn't mean I don't have emotions, an imagination, and a mix of active hormones to tend with. And a massage therapist is taught to consciously monitor his/her feelings. We couldn't be "Present" with the client if we denied them. Compared to the stereotypical male, ¹ the male therapist just "puts things on hold" for awhile. It's not that mysterious really - I'm not celibate, never have been by choice. ² And I'll be the first to tell you I'm not a saint. Yet, it does take a sense of priority, honesty, and some integrity, of course, and maybe even some very conscious effort and practice at first -- or when the situation is particularly "testy." While I'm fond of the quote, "No sainthood without temptation," my advice is, when a woman is on the table, try to do two things: 1) shoot for sainthood and yet, 2) do not let her put you on a pedestal. A bit of a tightrope maybe but that's my advice, because falling off that pedestal can make you think pretty deeply for awhile - and not because you sat serenely to contemplate philosophy.
One of the interesting aspects in the interaction of massage therapist and client, or between ANY two people touching each other actually, is that sensuality is a subjective experience. The intention of the applicator can sometimes have little significance (as relates to sensuality) on what is felt by the applicatee. Let me put that plainly: With some people I could (for the sake of example to get my meaning across) try to be sensual but, for various reasons, it may not be felt as sensual. Or, conversely, I can be just doing my technique thing for circulation and/or release of contracted musculature, etc, and it may be felt as sensual. It's something massage therapists do their best to maintain clarity on -- without undue focus, lest we cause the client to have undue focus on this. Interesting species we are!
Now there's the question of how to do gluteal muscles (yup, you know, the rumps). I suggest being a great communicator with a good sense of humor if you're going to do these more than the amount taught in Washington massage schools whose teachers have pretty much become paranoid about teaching such things. Not that the gluteal and rotator muscles arent' some of the largest, thickest, deepest, and most complex and essential muscles in the human body or anything. Not that achieving for these muscles -the same goals as you'd achieve for any other muscles- might be essential in preventing lumbar disk and sacro-illial ligament injury - the most common types of low back injuries, and those that lead to further debilitating complications. But actually it is, of course!
Ok, so what that means for you: In any case, it's still a good idea for male massage therapists, at least until he's developed some very good gut feelings about people, to be very careful about who gets on his table. And to consider having someone els in the office nearbye, preferably a female associate that he knows fairly well.
Footnotes
¹... Which I most likely am not (the stereotypical male) certainly given all the above statements, which I don't hear from most of the males I've ever known. But I am straight w/ no experience to the contrary & no desire for any. Ok, so... why advertise in Seattle Gay News? Speaking for myself, I advertise to reach the most PEOPLE (affordably) who can benefit from my services -- Regardless of their Race, Creed, Gender & other Genetic Related Aspects, or Lifestyle, so long as that lifestyle is not harmful to others. ² I don't respect bigotry or reverse-bigotry (or any other form of less-making, hate, enforced ignorance, revenge) -- in Seattle that can refer to some interesting attitudes. Maybe I'm just too idealistic ? And besides, most of my regular clients are gay men and they are among the finest people I know. I've also been told by some gay men that with me there is an advantage - not just because I'm not homophobic, but with a straight massage therapist (of the same gender at least) a gay person don't have to worry about being approached sexually when they want the overall lasting health effects of the massage. Which fact I've learned (perhaps sadly) will surprise a lot of gay *and* straight people, at least among those who don't live in Seattle or large diverse metropolitan areas. And, yes, dealing with phone calls from those who want/expect sex is something you have to learn if you advertize in gay publications. Especially in a state that (unofficially) permits gays to advertize services that (fairly blatantly in many cases) imply sex. And you (in most other cities/states of the U.S.) might think that would help clarify those that don't from those that do, right? Well, not only could thinking that be considered steriotyping (here), but the old sayings, "guys will be guys" and "jerks will be jerks," applies to the gay communities as well, even if women don't get to see it as much.
² My beliefs align with that of Vajrayana Buddhism , with the partial exception having to do with *therapeutic* release of emotion (as per Humanistic Psychology). And it's only a partial exception. Hint: my views resonate with the Vajrayana system in that it employs the 'vehicle' of relationship - and related activities and emotions - as a vehicle for enlightenment. (That doesn't mean everything is work, that joy and wonder and bliss can't be essential parts of a relationship. I wouldn't mind them being 90% of the deal! But in ANY case...) This system definitely attributes equal opportunity to the highest spiritual states/development. But as with most schools of Buddhism, it tends to teach 'control' of emotions (albeit an optimal form of such) vs the therapeutic release of emotions. Well, I'm not quite there yet.
However, to the degree one involves Vajrayana nature with one's partner (short of the full practice of Vajrayana, that is), the empathic capacities are drawn on and enhanced to a very high degree. Hence, for me, there is developed an increasing internal awareness of and appreciation for the nature of my partner with all the attendant issues of her gender and related roles, etc. In essence, I measure benefit of any spiritual practice, and how I'm doing on a given day, with the degree of compassion it instills, not in number or degree of powers or insights (psychic or otherwise), of material blessings or acknowledgments, of spiritual friends and associates, of visits by/with spiritual celebrities, nor even the number of genders I can make love to. Which introduces this next little part.
My other disagreement is with certain (few?) of the Vajrayana students who believe that *total* androgyny - including sexual practice - is the only real way to spiritual liberation (!). God bless for whomever that works (EG: for as long as it brings them happiness & enlightenment without interfering with that of others; same for any religious or spiritual path), but for me that (*total* androgyny thing) just rings of spiritual elitism. I mean, does that belief also require (for spiritual transcendance) the absolute development of all aspects of the brain as well, thereby requiring the eventual development of multiple-genius capacities ? (Not that either one indicates "perfection" -whatever that is- but y'know, there's all kinds of fundamentalists in the world, and I confess to being none of them.)
³ Energy efficiency and burnout considerations:
My muscles generally have rarely tired from doing massage, even after 4 or 5 sessions (1.5 hours each). [I wrote that 10+ years ago. Let's make that '3 sessions' now (2007)] Much of this due to my having done construction work for 10 years prior to doing this work. Good massage training includes learning *how* to use one's strength efficiently and safely in the long run. at NMAMAHA We were taught the principles of Tai Chi, which is nothing if not efficient use of energy. I also make a game of seeing how little muscle energy I can use, and/or how well I can distribute the load, including vary the way(s) I use apply my hands, arms, elbows, etc, to accomplish the task in the most efficient and proficient way. I actually first learned about this when shoveling creek rock at a construction site eight to ten hours a day for a week (partly because my mind is the type that is happiest with something to consciously focus on). By the 3rd day I had a rhythm, and a method of breathing and movement, and altering my stance so as to vary the load distribution for my muscles, that allowed continuous and accurate shovelings of rock up to 20 feet away, practically non-stop (eg: for hours at a stretch). And this was probably my first introduction to understanding the power of focused breathing and the science of yoga). So, when I do get tired it is more the result of what I'm doing (or not doing) with my emotional body, empathy, and "cords." [ *Cords* are emotional (some would say 'empathic' or 'psychic') connections to other people. The most common example is a mother's connection to her son or daughter. Most people are unaware of them. Twins often have such cords. But more subtle are those between mates and lovers, and anyone you have strong emotional connections with, or have attachment to his/her healing as a result of your investment of time and energy. Including with people in ones past who are not (consciously) thought about anymore, whether the emotions are positive or negative. And that's why sometimes it's good to become aware of these cords and to cut or attinuate/qualify some of them. There are techniques and systems for dealing with them, in case you wondered. I will send you a few (instructive essays or links to same) if you email me and ask.]
Quick "Personal Ad" Type Summary
INFJ or ENFJ would be my Myers/Briggs personality type if you know about that. It's as common as the Cardinal Cross symetrically overlain with the Grand Trine in my astrology chart (In case you're interested in that - more esoterica further below). I'm capable of looking at things from many viewpoints, yet also very much "in my body." Accomplished in many intellectual pursuits, yet can also be fairly present with feelings. Also very intuitive. And I never brag. HA! Well, hell, this is a personal ad, right? Ok, then... as I was saying (heheh)... Yeah, I know I have my weakpoints and liabilities. I'm fairly aware of my ego (or my inner child) and can also be aware of same in others, 'tho' I don't want to be my partner's therapist. Co-nurturer? yes. Friend? yes. Your only friend? No.
Was that my 'bad' sense of humor? I know the value of play as well as of work. Once I let down I and am with someone that I enjoy, then I enjoy finding out what she likes in another's presence. And if that still falls in the realm of "natural," or in fun play acting (I can do a few imitations, sometimes a parady of comical extremes or attitudes) then I can often have fun providing that. That developed partly because I'm not being afraid to share deeply, I've learned to keep abreast of what might come across as too deep or intense for someone at any given time. Was also due to my wanting to be an interesting (vs boring) dad to my daughter when she was growing up, and at that time, I was becoming aware that my limited conversational skills were a bit too focused on facts.
For those who DO enjoy deep discussion, or when they do, I can occasionally enjoy discussion around how one defines and lives such concepts as presence, sensitivity, courage, awareness, empathy, FUN, balance, maturity, and responsibility. Saying that is not saying I'm "an expert" on any of the above, but that it's very helpful (maybe essential) to know how to interpret what another says and means in order to come to understand that person. Granted, discussing ALL of that in one evening may get in the way of various fun pursuits, but over time all those areas are parts of the picture that puts everything else in context (IMO). At my political page are what I call 'constructive extrapolations' of my my own sense of values, definitions related to "success," and related issues and psychology around that as I speak to various socio-political situations. An example of that includes "Trends, Memory, Tracking, Credibility, and Forgiveness - Oh, and Trust (or 'Discrimination, Whether, When, or How to have Expectations of Accountability')."
No, I don't expect my ladyfriend to be as extensively written as I am (or even near it). But she might take an interest now and then in some of my writing so she'll have an idea about what I am passionate about, and so can have an understanding of my feelings around that. Obviously, I've proposed some pretty high goals and standards in my writings. But I also think we are all a work in progress, certainly as communities. And without high bearings, also balanced with reasonable compassion, we as communities won't accomplish much at all.
More about YOU (compatibles): You enjoy your body as well as your mind. And your Spirit is always a part of it all. Your work is likely about helping others be present with others or with the planet, or both. And while you may not realise that you provide that for others, you would know those two capabilities are related if I were to ask you. You would be honest and direct enough, yet kind enough, to tell me if you didn't appreciate my singing in the shower after making love with you. You'd like your lover to also be your friend, although you may not have a tremendous amount of faith in finding both of those in the same person. You like staying in shape - probably because you enjoy feeling your energy flowing in play as well as in work - likely because you are aware that have things to accomplish this lifetime, as well as more places or realms (including within yourself) to discover.
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'01 and '05 (yes, in that order - I didn't realize how old the beard made me look
Facebook Page & Pics |
Nightlife hangouts is more my area of lackspertise than expertise. Yes I made that up. Creativity is my friend. But I digress... Home movies are my friend. And I know more about places to walk or hike than to dance (although I do enjoy dancing, although I don't know "steps"). I know more about beaches to enjoy (and play drums at) than nightclubs. I know a few good places to eat, not a list. But I'm open to learning and exploring those things and places I don't know, as well as to holding you and learning who you are and what you like.
For the more esoterically inclined: Capricorn Sun, Sag-Rising, Aries Moon (with Grand Trine Symmetric over Cardinal Cross). Numerology: 11/3/22 (Soul/Path/Life Lesson numbers). You may not want to debate the purpose of life with someone who coined the term, "Metaphystemantennistics" (metaphysical epistemology + semantics + tennis). |
Thanks for stopping by. Before I go on, I just wanted to add that I'm eventually going to put some REALLY interesting stuff here ... although I'm not sure just what ... but I'll find some somewhere. 
)
-skipping the idea section and all the annotated thumb-links to help you navigate this page and this site for the other goodies here and abouts - that I worked so hard on to fix up 
